Why is it that I can never escape the guilt? Sam and I are off to Chicago this weekend for my nephew's 2nd birthday. Grace will be staying home and spending the weekend with Kris. Since it's pretty much impossible for a 3-year-old to keep quiet about something he is excited about, Grace pretty much knows the whole agenda for our day and a half in the Windy City. And she's heartbroken.
I keep telling myself that I should not feel guilty because she is just getting going with the whole potty training thing. Taking her on the road this weekend could screw up all progress we've made to this point, and if she did remember to tell me that she had to stop and go, it would pretty much be impossible to get her to a potty in time when I would be alone with two toddlers to get unbuckled, loaded into a stroller and into some disgusting public restroom where they run the risk of picking up hepatitis while using the facilities.
But the guilt of her not seeing family members who live states away is weighing on me. Also the fact that she will be missing out on going to the Children's Museum at Navy Pier with her cousin and brother is upsetting to me. But, at the same time, why shouldn't Sam get to have something that is just his? I think sometimes he gets so frustrated because his sister usually gets to do everything that he is doing and butts in on his exciting events.
Sam and I are packed and ready to hightail it out of here tomorrow afternoon after work. There is no chance of adding her to the equation at this stage in the game...I've fought the guilt. Sam brought it up with his sister again last night, and she became upset again saying that she wanted to see Caleb (my sister's son), too. I told her that she would see him at Thanksgiving at our house. Then she insisted that she had to see him at his house. At that point, I made a deal with her. I said this time would be Sam's turn and when Aunt Sarah has the baby, then she and I will go see the baby (and Caleb)...it will be her turn. Later that night, I was talking to my sister on the phone. Grace came in and I asked her if she wanted to talk to Aunt Sarah. She said, "She had the baby? It's my turn to go?" Poor baby. It'll be a few months, yet.
And don't even get me started on the Cleveland friends I miss dearly who are now residing in Chicago and whom I didn't even inform I was coming into town this time...so sorry, guys. The guilt...ow...it makes my head hurt.
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